I
had gotten home from outward bound last night. Only last night and it seemed
like months ago. We had been on the first flight to Orlando this morning. I was
exhausted. Steam from the shower rolled out from the bathroom, fogging up the
mirror. I slipped out the door to call my mom. Three men in suits stood guarding
one section of the hallway. I barely noticed them on my hunt for the elevator.
Finally I found it. It was tucked in a corner, away from the maze of halls. The
sliding doors popped open and out stepped another man with a suit on. I thought
nothing of it. I dialed my mom’s number as soon as the heavy doors shut. My mom
answered and I told her everything, the words spilling out of my mouth like a
waterfall. The elevator finally stopped. I had reached my destination. The
opening doors revealed seven men in SWAT uniforms with huge guns strapped
across their chest. “What floor were you on?” “Did you see anyone in camouflage?”
“Did anyone look suspicious?“ “Was anyone holding a gun?” they asked. “Three”
“No” “No” and “No” I answered. I was frightened. All I had wanted to do was
talk to my mom. They all loaded into the elevator and pressed the button for
the third floor. That was the floor my team was on. I hung up on my mom and
dialed my coach’s number. It rung and rung, but there was no answer. I called
and called, but no one picked up. I remember the day distinctly, every sense
more alert because of the potential danger. Turns out it was a mentally
unstable man threatening the hotel. At least that’s what we were told. No one
knows the full story.
Anabelle,
ReplyDeleteI thought this vignette was really good! I can't believe that this actually was a true story! You used a lot of visual imagery in this which I really liked. The similes you used tied in with the vignette really well too!
Annabelle, this was written really well! I could tell exactly what happened and how you were feeling in the moment. The thought of big men in SWAT uniforms and not knowing why they are there is really scary. This vignette also showed that you feel comfort from your mom because all you wanted to do was talk to her.
ReplyDeleteAnabelle you wrote this vignette really well! I like the details you give, it really puts the reader in your shoes. It was well organized, and took me through each step of the story without confusion while simultaneously explaining your emotional state.
ReplyDelete